Wow, that's a powerful quote, right? Are you ready to learn to say NO? Are you ready do learn why you absolutely need to develop this skill? This is one of my favorite subjects, so let's get into it!
As a smart, capable, adult woman, you will often be the one who is asked to add tasks to your already full schedule. Whether you're asked to sell cookies, join a group, volunteer at a bake sale, serve dinner at church, volunteer for a charity, you, the capable, hardworking woman, will always be asked.
And who can blame them? You're the one who is accomplishing things! You're the one who can get things done! There is a saying, "If you want to get something done, always ask a busy person to do it!" Busy people are almost always able to add "just one more thing" to their schedules. They are used to being busy and one more thing is just one more thing! But is YOUR "one more thing?"
What I'm going to suggest is that you manage your time so carefully, so ruthlessly, that you are able to fit everything YOU need to accomplish into your life. Here's why. If you don't manage your time, believe me, somebody else will. If you aren't diligent about managing what is important to you, you'll find that things just seem to be added to your days. And if you don't learn how to say NO, in a way that people hear the word NO, you'll find yourself asking, "How the heck did I get into this???" There are people out there who are very good at asking us to get involved in their goals. And some of those are extremely worthy goals - but are they YOUR goals?
When you get clear on what is important to you and what you need to accomplish to live your life the way YOU have planned it, it will be much easier for you to manage what you allow and do not allow in. You'll get very clear on whether something fits in to your season.
So let me ask you this: What is important to you? Your family, your day job, your side job, your quiet time with your partner, your quiet time alone, your friends, your workout time - all of these priorities, whatever they are for YOU, need to come first as you plan your schedule. And if you want each of these areas of your life to be successful and complete, you must give them the time they require. This also includes your downtime. If you don't allow yourself time to regroup, recover and restore, you'll find your energy level plummeting! Don't let that happen!
Here is where we might get a little bit uncomfortable. You must always ask yourself if the task you're being asked to participate in will bring you closer to your ideal life or pull you farther away from it by taking up too much of your time. I'm not suggesting you get mean! Just remember that you are living YOUR life and designing your life must be your top priority. The guilt you may feel when saying "NO" to someone is something you must work to get past. Just apologize and let the individual know that you just can't fit it in at this moment. "Catch me next time!"
So I leave you with this. Yes, feel free to add tasks that contribute to your life and your well being when you can. And be honest enough with yourself and your peers to say no when you cannot comfortably fit them in. You owe this to yourself. We are all given one life, and it is truly your responsibility to make choices for yourself and your family that reflect the life you have chosen.
Practice this now: "NO!"
With carefully curated love and admiration,
Donna
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