Hello Beautiful.
I hope you are doing magnificently today! Welcome to November! To Fall! To new, fresh air and a time for new beginnings. Beginnings chosen by you, as well as those not necessarily chosen by you! That is what November will he all about! Embracing change!
Sometimes it's a job loss, a relationship loss, an unexpected need to move to a different location for any one of a thousand reasons, but these changes ARE going to happen in one form or another from time to time. I also know you've heard people say this, "It's not what happens to us, it's how we react to it." Ugh. Clearly the change isn't happening to THAT person at the moment!
First of all, I will tell you that the best way to get past the difficulties we are faced with is to get through them. That means, don't bury your feelings. Don't bury your beautiful head in the sand. It wouldn't be fair to you to just power past your feelings as though they don't matter, because they absolutely do matter.
Of course there will be things that you must get through. You need to go to work. You need to continue to pay your bills and take care of yourself and your family. There will be times when you will feel like you need to act out a Scarlett O'Hara scene and say, "I'm not going to think about that now. I'll think about that tomorrow." Just to get yourself dressed and out the door. But...
When these moments show up for you, please go easy on yourself. Breathe. Allow these feelings to bubble up to the surface. Give yourself permission to cry, yell, jump up and down, bury your head under the covers! Yes, you ARE allowed to FEEL. And you need to feel. By allowing yourself to feel your emotions, you help them to pass more quickly. When you keep your emotions buried, you keep that bad energy boiling beneath the surface and as long as it's sitting down there, it will continue to effect you.
Try to think of those bad feelings as waves on the ocean. The water rises higher and higher as it reaches the shore, crashes and then flattens out and calms down. When you're experiencing a painful situation, there is no way to deny that your feelings will grow stronger for a while, just like those waves. The feelings will get to a high point, where you feel like you'll crash and burn if you don't put a stop to them. But by allowing yourself the time to sit with the experience at that point, allowing yourself to FEEL how you feel, without judging yourself or judging what happened or placing blame, you will find that the waves will wash over your head and eventually smooth out for you. They are just feelings. Feelings change. Just give them a chance to flow and pass.
Please don't think I'm minimizing what you are going through. Believe me, I have been there. But I promise you that approaching change in this way will make it so much easier for you.
You will need to take the appropriate action, meaning replace the job, or whatever else is necessary because of the change, but dealing with emotions the way I have described here will create a sense of calm and control for you. You will thrive on that sense of calm and control.
Knowing that you are managing the situation with grace and ease will be a confidence builder for you as well. Once you've dealt with the difficult issue at hand, what the hell can ever hold you back in the future??? NOTHING, my love. Nothing at all.
I, as your virtual coach promise you this: You are one hundred percent equipped to do every bit of this. You have the power and the ability to come out on the other side of the drama unscathed and more powerful than you were before it all happened. Please, please trust me on this.
With love, grace and ease,
Donna
And if you would like some information on how you and I can work one-on-one together, please email me at Curateddonna@gmail.com
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